3 weeks in

It is the 22nd of January, 3 weeks into the new year, I have nothing really exciting to report, it has been very slow and similar to my last years in ways I am not proud to admit.  This is my story though, and I almost manage to make it ok, you see, things are not right enough for me to know that I do need to do something but they are also not quite bad enough for me to know that that I have to do something or lose my self forever, and it just disappoints me that I am able to brush it off. Am I really that week!!!? Can I not stick with a program a decision for at least a month? or am I being too harsh on myself?

I told myself that I would get healthier, and to do this I would eat right and put in those exercise hours, and I have been good, the last two weeks were ok, this week I went on Monday and have not gone back. I also had fruit cake for breakfast yesterday and today. What the hell am I thinking!!! or am I being too harsh on myself.

I said I would write more this year and I had a plan for that too, I would set time aside and I would write 1000 words a month. I wrote 200 in week one and have not gone back, I even found a mentor and everything, and all she asked was 800 words, and I have nothing for her, and what did I do with my weekend instead of writing? I slept. I slept and slept and read cheesy M/M fiction, then ate pizza and chicken and slept some more. why do I do these things? like really?

Anyway, I will not be discouraged, I will go to the gym today and I will push for 1 hour to make up for yesterday.

I will do it too